In Response To: Re: Just snagged this (*mxyzptlk)
Dawn rose from her crystalline slumber and stepped lightly onto the pillowy carpet. Yesterday was over. She shed a tear at the passing of the day; its like never to return. The suns were beginning to rise above the crater. The green light was theraputic. The massive amount of cough syrup must have killed the redneck she had handcuffed to her sink. She told him he shouldn't have taken so much, and that she and her companions would return him to rural Arkansas after the anal probe. The pressure must just have been too much for him, alas. Dawn inspected the body, the light of the two suns causing it to cast a bizarre double shadow. Funny, in this alien light, he almost looked like Glenn Danzig. It was awful. Dawn hated Glenn Danzig with a passion that approached fanaticism. She considered this for a moment and hatched a plan. She and her associates would abduct the horrible singer and make him suffer for his crimes against humanity. She was going to cut his hair first. He looked like some kind of butt-ugly woman. And she was sick of his parading around. She would dress him in Land's End garb after cutting that hideous hair. Yeah... then they were going to begin the anal probe, no alien abduction was complete without one. When they were done, he'd never have the urge to 'sing' again. She turned to him, a devilish grin on her face. Danzig soiled his snakeskin pants, for he was sore afraid. "Ah, it doesn't matter, my overbuffed talentless hack", she clucked, "It's an understandable reaction, and not the last one you'll experience before we're through." Her associates lifted the foul smelling singer and attached him to their machine for analysis right before Johnny Echohawk showed up with his bag of tricks. Them analysis gals never saw ol' Johnny on th' horizon. Yep- it was time for a-kaboomin'. Well, it would have been time for a-kaboomin', except Johnny saw who the subject of the experiments would be. He dropped his bag and asked if there was anything he could do to help Dawn and her associates. He reached into his pocket for a stick of Doublemint. He was gonna enjoy this dose. The gum was laced with LSD, and helped him concentrate. They might admire his "skills," but only he knew it was a matter of demons from the eighth dimension whispering to him the uncanny secrets of humanoid nature. Yes, they would be impressed.
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