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Halo Hamlet
Posted By: Jordan117	Date: 12/7/06 3:04 p.m.
This board is far too clogged with commercial speculation, so here's something completely different... The other day in English class we had an interesting creative writing assignment. Basically, we had to take the famous "To be or not to be" soliloquy from Shakespeare's Hamlet and modify it so it talked about another subject. Some chose their pets, some chose sports. I chose Halo -- on Xbox Live, to be specific. Where Hamlet ruminated on why people choose to live life in the face of tremendous suffering, this asks the more important question: why play Xbox Live when so many people on it are jerks and assholes? Anyway, here it is in all its lyrical glory: * * * To play or not to play? That is the question. Whether 'tis nobler in the mind to suffer The superjumps and standbys of outrageous cheaters, Or to take arms against a sea of mods, And by quitting end them? To quit, to play, No more. And by quitting we end The heartache and the thousand natural shocks That Live is heir to, 'tis a consummation Devoutly to be wished. To quit, to stop, To never play again -- yes, there's the catch. For in that span of time what boredom comes When we have switched off this “mere game”, Must give us pause -- there's the need That makes a necessity of so long a session; For who would bear the whips and scorns of Slayer, The oppressor's cheats, the proud man's teabagging, The pangs of unrequited Friend Requests, the Banhammer’s delay, The insolence of tweens and the spurns That patient sportmanship of the spoilsports takes, When he himself might his endgame make With the “off” button? Who would campers bear, To grunt and sweat under a weary LAN, But that the dread of something after Halo, The undiscovered Life from whose land No traveller returns, puzzles the will And makes us rather bear those ills we have Than fly to others that we know not of? Thus ennui does make players of us all; And thus the native hue of responsibility Is sicklied over with the pale cast of the television, And enterprises of great pith and moment With this regard their currents turn awry, And lose the name of action. Soft you now! The fair Shishka! Nymph, in thy sarcasm Be all my words remembered. * * * Here is the original, for reference. Hope ya'll liked it... ^_^

Message Index

Halo Hamlet	Jordan117	12/7/06 3:04 p.m.
Re: Halo Hamlet	The More Deluded	12/7/06 3:21 p.m.
Re: Halo Hamlet	Cress77	12/7/06 3:24 p.m.
Front page!	Jordan117	12/7/06 3:26 p.m.
Awesome! *NM*	Eastbeast314	12/7/06 3:39 p.m.
Re: Halo Hamlet	SIRBOE	12/7/06 3:48 p.m.
Re: Halo Hamlet	Spec_Ops_Assault	12/7/06 4:56 p.m.
In Reply to your Eloquence	AngelicLionheart	12/7/06 4:57 p.m.
Awesome! Love it! *NM*	Omniscient	12/7/06 5:03 p.m.
Brilliant! *NM*	Guesty-Persony-Thingy	12/7/06 5:06 p.m.
Re: Excellent!	Sep7imus [subnova]	12/7/06 5:06 p.m.
XD *NM*	Jordan117	12/7/06 5:13 p.m.
Well done! ....like a glove!	3Suns	12/7/06 5:35 p.m.
Move over Shakespere!	IceWeasel	12/7/06 5:59 p.m.
Excellent *NM*	raptor117	12/7/06 6:15 p.m.
Re: Halo Hamlet	Shishka	12/7/06 7:21 p.m.
Definitions...	Jordan117	12/7/06 8:16 p.m.
Re: Halo Hamlet	Monochron	12/7/06 9:33 p.m.
Re: Halo Hamlet	taylor_	12/7/06 11:34 p.m.
But seriously...	doober187	12/8/06 1:26 a.m.
Re: But seriously...	Jordan117	12/8/06 2:11 a.m.
Re: But seriously...(Halo:Hamlet-Jordan117)	doober187	1/22/07 1:08 a.m.
Re: But seriously...(Halo:Hamlet-Jordan117)	Jordan117	1/22/07 2:53 a.m.
Re: But seriously...(Halo:Hamlet-Jordan117)	doober187	1/22/07 3:55 a.m.
Nice. Anyone for cyborg verse?	Rockslider	12/8/06 4:07 p.m.
Nice job.	Barcode711	12/8/06 9:01 p.m.
Har Har, similar project.	DanteThePoet	1/22/07 3:12 a.m.