Ye Olde Scenario Roundup Thingy
Posted By: ScifitekiDate: 11/11/02 9:03 p.m.

That's right, it's that time of the year again, time for...
Scifiteki's Roundup Of Projects That Should Be Asystolic/Flatlining!

The Adventures Of Beaverman: Well, I mean, come on. The Adventures of Beaverman? To quote it's one and only news mention:
"inbed the wrapers of perviosly owned harry potter condoms into the forehead of giant angery bird things "
I'm doubting this ever got anywhere. More to the point, would we want it to? Plus, of course, it hasn't mentioned in about 11 months.
VERDICT: Dead as a doornail.

Alexineth: Made by the redoubtable Meowx Studios. Unfortuntately, Meowx, who was a more common feature of the EV boards, I believe, dissapeared more than a year ago. The main site for Meowx Studios is far gone. And it hasn't been mentioned in over a year and a half.
VERDICT: Really, really dead. Like, rotting, and stuff.

Marathon: Vietnam: What's this thing doing still pretending to be alive, and all that? It's body parts are strewn far and wide across the Orphanage, for thingy's sake! Even the scenario page does not doubt this! Marathon: Vietnam, cool concept as it might have been, is far and away dead.
VERDICT: Dead, like one of those wombats that you see on the side of the highway, with all the flies, and stuff.

The Battle Mage Project: Well... Good old Ross, with all his inferiority complexes and everything, last asked for a sprite artist, a little less than a year ago. It's now less than a year later, and it would appear that no sprite artists were forthcoming. Too bad. He should have given it to the Orphanage.... Just goes to show you, mapmakers and writers, never depend on finding a artist. Good ones are ridiculously rare, and chances are they won't want to work with someone as ugly and annoying as you. : )
VERDICT: The vultures have finished circling.

Clerks: Another Marathon Scenario that just screams at you, "I'm Gonna Die!" One mention. Year and a half ago. A scenario that aimed to be realistic, on a probably unworkable scale. And about Clerks. Do I really need to say more?
VERDICT: Shuffled off this mortal coil.

Beyond Reality: Oh, just move the darn thing, already. : ) Out of interest, did anybody catch those demos that Agol put out? The Headmaster may be interested in them.

Marathon: Idiocy: Well, it was gonna have stick figures, I mean, really, what did you expect? And, woah, a whole *two* years of non-mention. I think the little bugger's a little on the cold side, personally. Even it's site (Non-existent server) confirms this.
VERDICT: Dead-dy dead, dead dead.

Black Nova: I don't know what this scenario was, or how many times it managed to get snuck into the scenarionews, because it hasn't been mentioned for at least 3 years. Maybe more, and it never had a site. So we can safely say, I think: ""
VERDICT: Well, I said it already, didn't I?

Marathon Lethavian(Both Of Them): There's two of these guys, funnily enough. One is already in the Orphanage, (It was one of the earliest addtions, as far as I can tell), and the other is entirely composed of that ever-appearing guy Ryan Foran, otherwise known as axiocranium. Funny to see him there. But, no apparently-dead project escapes Scifiteki's Big Stick Of Wackness, and it hasn't been mentioned in a little less than a year and a half.
VERDICT: If it's not dead, it's probably at least in a coma losing bodily fluids.

Enternal: Heeey... Is it just me, or wasn't this one of the projects that was orginally considered for integration with Rubicon? Go to Rubicon's site, and read the maker's testemonials thingy, or whatever you want to call it. Anyway, it hasn't been updated since the start of this year. Where is the bugger?
VERDICT: Is it dead? Well, we think so. Let's prod it a little, as see if it twitches.

Marathon 5: This always seemed a little strange to me, but, hey, it hasn't been mentioned in around two years, and the site hasn't been upadated since October of last year. That's too bad, those textures looked cool. Oh well. Why *was* it *5*, anyway? : )
VERDICT: I pronouce thee dead. Like a skunk, dead. Yeah. So there.

Well, that's all the scenarios I can be bothered to look up and write down now, although I have no doubt there are many, many more just waiting to have their dead bodies yanked out of those precious, precious seat-warmer doohickies. Feel free to mention your own deadies, if you will.

And a mention to any authors of dead projects... Send your stuff into the Orphanage!! This is a really good idea, and it's one I've seen in no other place. Make sure that future, more motivated generations of Marathon Fanatics can make use of your half-finished ramblings. If you don't believe that a scenario's corpse could be used to enhance another, or even just get completed by another, check out M:Rubicon. I think that worked. : )

Heh. As a part-time corpse scavenger, it amuses me to note that Nicolas J Head, (a member of one of those projects that didn't die, TI), metioned this:
"To all those out there still working on their major scenarios - keep working. I'm still keen for the likes of Earthbound, Grendal, Hoth and SC Cartel. To those out there that announced their scenarios, put up web pages, made big claims and failed to follow through - you suck, and I mean that! "

Heh. One will note that all of those projects are now quite safely deceased. Just goes to show you, doesn't it. You can never tell... And making a serious Marathon Major Scenario, or even TC is a lot harder, a lot more time-consuming that you might at first think. And the ones that cone through are almost never the ones that make the big claims. : )

Cutting the wheat from the chaff, then gorging himself on the wheat like the pig that he is, and then selling the chaff to illiterate, gullible farmers, and so forth,

The Orphanage: Where to go, when the graves say no

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Pre-2004 Posts


Ye Olde Scenario Roundup ThingyScifiteki 11/11/02 9:03 p.m.
     Re: Ye Olde Scenario Roundup ThingyClaude Errera 11/11/02 11:56 p.m.
           Scenario ... scenarios ...Ernie 11/12/02 10:59 a.m.
                 Re: Scenario ... scenarios ...D-M.A. 11/12/02 10:49 p.m.
           Re: Ye Olde Scenario Roundup ThingyD-M.A. 11/12/02 10:53 p.m.
     Re: Ye Olde Scenario Roundup ThingyVaxuum BOB 11/18/02 4:12 a.m.
           Re: Ye Olde Scenario Roundup ThingyClaude Errera 11/18/02 4:33 a.m.
     Solace Status ReportOrion 12/11/02 12:39 a.m.
           Re: Solace Status ReportClaude Errera 12/11/02 7:06 a.m.
           Re: Solace Status ReportJohannes Gunnar 12/11/02 7:45 a.m.

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