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1 minute Halo (spoilers)
Posted By: Vid BoiDate: 7/1/06 1:38 a.m.

In Response To: Re: 7 Minute M:I is coming... (Funkmon)

: Heh. Someone should do this with other Bungie games.

1 minute Halo:

On the Pillar of Autumn.

KEYES: Help, aliens! Let's land on this big ring.
MC: Good morning.

On Halo.

MC: Good morning.
CORTANA: Let's save some marines.
COVENANT: Arr.

CORTANA: This large metallic box-shaped man-made tunnel full of electronics is not a natural formation.
COVENANT: Arr.
CORTANA: Save those marines.

CORTANA: Let's save Captain Keyes, who has gotten himself into some serious trouble.

On the Truth And Reconciliation.

COVENANT: Arr.
KEYES: I hate you for saving me, idiot.
CORTANA: Save these marines.

Back on Halo.

CORTANA: I'm not 100% sure, but travel to this faraway location.
COVENANT: Arr.
CORTANA: We can single-handedly fight back entire battle fleets, but I'll be darned if we can get past this closed door. Go to this other location instead.
COVENANT: Arr.

CORTANA: Finally, we're here. Now, travel to this other faraway location.
COVENANT: Arr.

In the control room.

MC: These are the first words I speak since we landed.
CORTANA: Shut up and travel to this faraway location. You must save Captain Keyes, who has gotten himself into some serious trouble.

At a faraway location.

HALLWAYS: [Harrowing silence]
CORPSE: Boo!
FLOOD: ZOMBIE SPACE MUTANTS ATTACK!
343GS: Greetings, I'm British.

In the library.

343GS: I'm 100% sure that you need to travel to this faraway location, but I don't feel like teleporting you all the way there.
FLOOD: Arr.
343GS: Hmm hm hm hm hmm hmmmm hmmm.
343GS: Hmm hm hm hm hmm hmmmm hmmm.
343GS: Hmm hm hm hm hmm hmmmm hmmm.
343GS: Hmm hm hm hm hmm hmmmm hmmm.
343GS: Hmm hm hm hm hmm hmmmm hmmm.
343GS: Hmm hm hm hm hmm hmmmm hmmm.
343GS: Hmm hm hm hm hmm hmmmm hmmm.
343GS: Hmm hm hm hm hmm hmmmm hmmm.
343GS: Hmm hm hm hm hmm hmmmm hmmm.

In the control room.

343GS: ...and even though teleportation is apparently instantaneous, I am somehow in the middle of a conversation.
CORTANA: You're both dumbasses, Halo is a weapon and now I'll steal this physical object so the Halo can never be fired.

COVENANT: Arr.
CORTANA: The index was actually just a stick, 343GS is firing the Halo anyway. Let's explode everything.
COVENANT: Arr.
CORTANA: But first, let's save Captain Keyes, who has gotten himself into some serious trouble.

On the Truth And Reconciliation.

CORTANA: I'm a comic relief.
COVENANT: Arr.
MC: Only I can survive this fall.
COVENANT: Arr.

KEYES: I hate you for saving me, idiot.
[MC tears out Keyes' entire face and digs out the gory, slime-covered neural implants from his bloated, suppurating blob-corpse.
MC: I've been wanting to do that for so long.
CORTANA: Now I'm not 100% sure, but travel to this faraway location.

On the Pillar of Autumn.

343GS: I'm invincible! I'll bite your legs off!
CORTANA: Wildcat, wildcat! Quick, frog blast the vent core. ....wildcat.
VENT CORE: [Blast!]

In space.

COVENANT AND MARINES: Quick, everyone hide behind the nearest planet or something in time for the open ending.
HALO: I'm exploding!

CORTANA: The End.
MC: No... I have a feeling this is an open ending.

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Pre-2004 Posts

Replies:

7 Minute M:I is coming...Chris Biberstein 6/26/06 8:40 a.m.
     Re: 7 Minute M:I is coming...Andrew Nagy 6/26/06 11:17 a.m.
           Re: 7 Minute M:I is coming...Bob-B-Q 6/27/06 7:06 a.m.
     Re: 7 Minute M:I is coming...Funkmon 6/27/06 7:57 p.m.
           Re: 7 Minute M:I is coming...Forrest of B.org 6/28/06 7:18 a.m.
                 Re: 7 Minute M:I is coming...Adam Ashwell 6/28/06 12:17 p.m.
           1 minute Halo (spoilers)Vid Boi 7/1/06 1:38 a.m.
                 Re: 1 minute Halo (spoilers) *LINK*DangerousHippo 7/1/06 7:14 a.m.
                 *claps*Funkmon 7/1/06 7:33 a.m.
                 Re: 1 minute Halo (spoilers)Morpheus 7/23/06 12:33 p.m.
                 1 minute ONITimBranin 7/23/06 9:23 p.m.
                       That was like 10 mins ONI ;-) *NM*Nicholai 7/26/06 5:57 a.m.
                             Yeah, well that's because you read slow.TimBranin 1/12/07 9:41 p.m.
                                   lol I wasn't expecting that!Nicholai 1/13/07 7:50 p.m.

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Pre-2004 Posts

 

 

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