Some Insight





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Some Insight

Posted By: grantix Date: 3/9/11 9:35 p.m.
In Response To: Re: Isolated incident? (DEEP NNN)

This isn't official, and I can tell you that pretty easily.
Not that grammar would make or break this thing, solely, but there are a few grammatical errors throughout this thing. Many uses of "That" instead of "Which".
"I recently came across your request for information on Orion F484. How you even came across his name is beyond me, let alone what few salient facts you seem to possess. Considering the classified nature of the events surrounding everything that transpired, it's no surprise that your request was shot dead. I'm going to give you a gentle word of advice – keep up your requests, and you'll be the same way."
Should be a "which".
I just would expect better grammar from 343i, what with Frankie and a few other writers working over there.
Secondly, as someone who is currently enlisted in the military, and, as a matter of fact is actually in EOD school, I can point out some flaws which 343i would have the money to investigate.
PFC: Army rank.
CPL: Army and Marine rank.
Swabbie: Navy jargon.
If they're supposed to be Marines, which I would expect, considering this is Halo... that PFC rank should not be there, at all.
Either way, a PFC EOD tech would not be running the scene. And CPL's aren't in EOD. A Staff Sergeant or a Sergeant would be. And he'd have, most likely, one or two other EOD techs with him.
And... he would most likely not be reporting to some CPL. There would be an officer on scene.
All in all... I'd say this was an excited fan, trying to push out an interesting fanfic. But definitely not official.

Message Index

Replies:

Captain, not everybody is blowing you off... ISitInA 3/9/11 3:12 p.m.

E21A9.6411A.7 ISitInA 3/9/11 3:13 p.m.

...wat? *NM* Hyokin 3/9/11 3:54 p.m.

What he said. *NM* UnrealCh13f 3/9/11 4:05 p.m.

Re: What he said. Gilver 3/9/11 4:09 p.m.

Re: What he said. Louis Wu 3/9/11 4:11 p.m.

Consider my interest piqued SonGoharotto 3/9/11 4:32 p.m.

Re: Agreed 7.5 million percent *NM* Hedgemony 3/9/11 5:12 p.m.

Agreellionaire! *NM* Beckx 3/9/11 5:18 p.m.

It's replies that this that need a like button *NM* onebitrocket 3/10/11 7:11 a.m.

Hmm... Quirel 3/10/11 11:53 a.m.

Agreemanjaro! *NM* SonGoharotto 3/10/11 7:37 p.m.

Re: What he said. Gilver 3/9/11 5:40 p.m.

My apologies Hive 3/9/11 4:16 p.m.

Re: My apologies ErrantVagrant 3/9/11 6:27 p.m.

I live to serve! Hive 3/9/11 6:42 p.m.

That was nice. ZackDark 3/9/11 6:59 p.m.

Re: That was nice. Hive 3/9/11 7:17 p.m.

Re: That was nice. DEEP NNN 3/9/11 7:42 p.m.

UNSC Theseus Hive 3/9/11 7:50 p.m.

About the Covenant ZackDark 3/9/11 9:28 p.m.

Re: Status Inquiry RD Carnage 3/9/11 7:43 p.m.

Re: Anomolies Inquiry Hive 3/9/11 7:57 p.m.

Re: Anomolies Inquiry GrimBrother One 3/9/11 8:00 p.m.

Re: Anomolies Inquiry Hive 3/9/11 8:10 p.m.

Re: Anomolies Inquiry GrimBrother One 3/9/11 8:13 p.m.

Committee of Minds for Security Hive 3/9/11 8:18 p.m.

I find it interesting... GrimBrother One 3/9/11 7:58 p.m.

Re: I find it interesting... DEEP NNN 3/9/11 8:13 p.m.

Re: I find it interesting... GrimBrother One 3/9/11 8:16 p.m.

Man... CyberKN 3/9/11 7:58 p.m.

Re: Bees... Hive 3/9/11 8:00 p.m.

Try this, Hive: Hyokin 3/9/11 8:11 p.m.

Re: Bees... NartFOpc 3/9/11 8:13 p.m.

Re: Bees... Hive 3/9/11 8:20 p.m.

Re: That was nice. Apollo Quinn 3/14/11 2:05 p.m.

Re: That was nice. The Loot 3/14/11 6:21 p.m.

ALERT! Hive 3/10/11 12:21 a.m.

Re: ALERT! NsU Soldier 3/10/11 12:22 a.m.

Status sqorck 3/10/11 12:28 a.m.

Re: Status jo 3/10/11 1:01 a.m.

Re: My apologies ThePhoenixAeon 3/9/11 8:03 p.m.

Re: My apologies arbitersaids 3/9/11 8:12 p.m.

Re: Covenant Hive 3/9/11 8:15 p.m.

Re: Covenant DEEP NNN 3/9/11 8:51 p.m.

Re: Covenant Hive 3/9/11 8:56 p.m.

Re: Covenant Arithmomaniac 3/9/11 9:15 p.m.

An unofficial advisory warning Hive 3/9/11 9:34 p.m.

Re: An unofficial advisory warning Dielectric 3/9/11 10:26 p.m.

Re: An unofficial advisory warning ISitInA 3/9/11 10:55 p.m.

Re: An unofficial advisory warning Twitch 3/10/11 12:16 a.m.

Re: An unofficial advisory warning ZackDark 3/10/11 12:40 a.m.

Re: An unofficial advisory warning JPJ007 3/10/11 1:05 a.m.

Re: An unofficial advisory warning ThePhoenixAeon 3/10/11 7:52 p.m.

Re: An unofficial advisory warning Time Glitch 3/10/11 11:55 p.m.

Only 43rd annual celebration? ruwe_44 3/10/11 11:28 a.m.

Re: Covenant SonGoharotto 3/10/11 7:52 p.m.

Re: My apologies thereIwasn't 3/9/11 9:22 p.m.

Re: E21A9.6411A.7 Schooly D 3/9/11 4:17 p.m.

Re: E21A9.6411A.7 caleb ex nihilo 3/9/11 5:24 p.m.

Re: E21A9.6411A.7 Firemist 3/9/11 5:54 p.m.

Re: E21A9.6411A.7 Hyokin 3/9/11 7:09 p.m.

DEFIANT ? DEEP NNN 3/9/11 5:46 p.m.

Re: DEFIANT ? DEEP NNN 3/9/11 6:25 p.m.

Re: E21A9.6411A.7 Stephen L. (SoundEffect) 3/9/11 6:10 p.m.

I'm not going to lie... padraig08 3/9/11 6:41 p.m.

Good dialogue, if nothing else. *NM* Duncan 3/9/11 4:31 p.m.

Notice the date 2612 ~60 years after the war... *NM* ruwe_44 3/9/11 5:37 p.m.

Re: Captain, not everybody is blowing you off... ChrisTheeCrappy 3/9/11 6:12 p.m.

Hmm, Lets see where this goes. *NM* ElzarTheBam 3/9/11 6:16 p.m.

Isolated incident? thereIwasn't 3/9/11 8:33 p.m.

Re: Isolated incident? arbitersaids 3/9/11 8:38 p.m.

Re: Isolated incident? thereIwasn't 3/9/11 8:49 p.m.

Re: Isolated incident? DEEP NNN 3/9/11 8:53 p.m.

Re: Isolated incident? thereIwasn't 3/9/11 8:59 p.m.

Re: Isolated incident? DEEP NNN 3/9/11 9:02 p.m.

Some Insight grantix 3/9/11 9:35 p.m.

Re: Some Insight thereIwasn't 3/9/11 9:39 p.m.

Re: Some Insight DEEP NNN 3/9/11 9:53 p.m.

Re: Some Insight Harmanimus 3/10/11 1:00 a.m.

Re: Isolated incident? Decommissioner 3/9/11 8:39 p.m.

Re: Isolated incident? DEEP NNN 3/9/11 8:45 p.m.

Re: Isolated incident? thereIwasn't 3/9/11 9:08 p.m.

Re: Isolated incident? Raigns 3/9/11 10:56 p.m.

I'll try.. *NM* sqorck 3/10/11 1:04 a.m.

I got one back! sqorck 3/10/11 1:28 a.m.

I just sent "Hello, Hive is this you?" *NM* sqorck 3/10/11 1:33 a.m.

Another sqorck 3/10/11 1:43 a.m.

Re: Another Raigns 3/10/11 2:32 p.m.

Acronym? What? Don't think so... Duncan 3/10/11 7:52 a.m.

Re: Acronym? What? Don't think so... thereIwasn't 3/10/11 9:35 a.m.

Re: Captain, not everybody is blowing you off... LoneRanger 2.5 3/9/11 8:40 p.m.

Re: Captain, not everybody is blowing you off... FyreWulff 3/10/11 2:53 a.m.

Re: Captain, not everybody is blowing you off... ThePhoenixAeon 3/10/11 11:12 a.m.

Sent Chair a direct email Carver 3/10/11 5:51 p.m.

Re: Sent Chair a direct email Carver 3/10/11 6:12 p.m.

Re: Captain, not everybody is blowing you off... sclamons 3/12/11 11:36 a.m.

Re: Captain, not everybody is blowing you off... sclamons 3/12/11 10:46 p.m.

Re: Captain, not everybody is blowing you off... Guywired 3/16/11 9:41 a.m.

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Captain, not everybody is blowing you off...	ISitInA	3/9/11 3:12 p.m.
E21A9.6411A.7	ISitInA	3/9/11 3:13 p.m.
...wat? NM	Hyokin	3/9/11 3:54 p.m.
What he said. NM	UnrealCh13f	3/9/11 4:05 p.m.
Re: What he said.	Gilver	3/9/11 4:09 p.m.
Re: What he said.	Louis Wu	3/9/11 4:11 p.m.
Consider my interest piqued	SonGoharotto	3/9/11 4:32 p.m.
Re: Agreed 7.5 million percent NM	Hedgemony	3/9/11 5:12 p.m.
Agreellionaire! NM	Beckx	3/9/11 5:18 p.m.
It's replies that this that need a like button NM	onebitrocket	3/10/11 7:11 a.m.
Hmm...	Quirel	3/10/11 11:53 a.m.
Agreemanjaro! NM	SonGoharotto	3/10/11 7:37 p.m.
Re: What he said.	Gilver	3/9/11 5:40 p.m.
My apologies	Hive	3/9/11 4:16 p.m.
Re: My apologies	ErrantVagrant	3/9/11 6:27 p.m.
I live to serve!	Hive	3/9/11 6:42 p.m.
That was nice.	ZackDark	3/9/11 6:59 p.m.
Re: That was nice.	Hive	3/9/11 7:17 p.m.
Re: That was nice.	DEEP NNN	3/9/11 7:42 p.m.
UNSC Theseus	Hive	3/9/11 7:50 p.m.
About the Covenant	ZackDark	3/9/11 9:28 p.m.
Re: Status Inquiry	RD Carnage	3/9/11 7:43 p.m.
Re: Anomolies Inquiry	Hive	3/9/11 7:57 p.m.
Re: Anomolies Inquiry	GrimBrother One	3/9/11 8:00 p.m.
Re: Anomolies Inquiry	Hive	3/9/11 8:10 p.m.
Re: Anomolies Inquiry	GrimBrother One	3/9/11 8:13 p.m.
Committee of Minds for Security	Hive	3/9/11 8:18 p.m.
I find it interesting...	GrimBrother One	3/9/11 7:58 p.m.
Re: I find it interesting...	DEEP NNN	3/9/11 8:13 p.m.
Re: I find it interesting...	GrimBrother One	3/9/11 8:16 p.m.
Man...	CyberKN	3/9/11 7:58 p.m.
Re: Bees...	Hive	3/9/11 8:00 p.m.
Try this, Hive:	Hyokin	3/9/11 8:11 p.m.
Re: Bees...	NartFOpc	3/9/11 8:13 p.m.
Re: Bees...	Hive	3/9/11 8:20 p.m.
Re: That was nice.	Apollo Quinn	3/14/11 2:05 p.m.
Re: That was nice.	The Loot	3/14/11 6:21 p.m.
ALERT!	Hive	3/10/11 12:21 a.m.
Re: ALERT!	NsU Soldier	3/10/11 12:22 a.m.
Status	sqorck	3/10/11 12:28 a.m.
Re: Status	jo	3/10/11 1:01 a.m.
Re: My apologies	ThePhoenixAeon	3/9/11 8:03 p.m.
Re: My apologies	arbitersaids	3/9/11 8:12 p.m.
Re: Covenant	Hive	3/9/11 8:15 p.m.
Re: Covenant	DEEP NNN	3/9/11 8:51 p.m.
Re: Covenant	Hive	3/9/11 8:56 p.m.
Re: Covenant	Arithmomaniac	3/9/11 9:15 p.m.
An unofficial advisory warning	Hive	3/9/11 9:34 p.m.
Re: An unofficial advisory warning	Dielectric	3/9/11 10:26 p.m.
Re: An unofficial advisory warning	ISitInA	3/9/11 10:55 p.m.
Re: An unofficial advisory warning	Twitch	3/10/11 12:16 a.m.
Re: An unofficial advisory warning	ZackDark	3/10/11 12:40 a.m.
Re: An unofficial advisory warning	JPJ007	3/10/11 1:05 a.m.
Re: An unofficial advisory warning	ThePhoenixAeon	3/10/11 7:52 p.m.
Re: An unofficial advisory warning	Time Glitch	3/10/11 11:55 p.m.
Only 43rd annual celebration?	ruwe_44	3/10/11 11:28 a.m.
Re: Covenant	SonGoharotto	3/10/11 7:52 p.m.
Re: My apologies	thereIwasn't	3/9/11 9:22 p.m.
Re: E21A9.6411A.7	Schooly D	3/9/11 4:17 p.m.
Re: E21A9.6411A.7	caleb ex nihilo	3/9/11 5:24 p.m.
Re: E21A9.6411A.7	Firemist	3/9/11 5:54 p.m.
Re: E21A9.6411A.7	Hyokin	3/9/11 7:09 p.m.
DEFIANT ?	DEEP NNN	3/9/11 5:46 p.m.
Re: DEFIANT ?	DEEP NNN	3/9/11 6:25 p.m.
Re: E21A9.6411A.7	Stephen L. (SoundEffect)	3/9/11 6:10 p.m.
I'm not going to lie...	padraig08	3/9/11 6:41 p.m.
Good dialogue, if nothing else. NM	Duncan	3/9/11 4:31 p.m.
Notice the date 2612 ~60 years after the war... NM	ruwe_44	3/9/11 5:37 p.m.
Re: Captain, not everybody is blowing you off...	ChrisTheeCrappy	3/9/11 6:12 p.m.
Hmm, Lets see where this goes. NM	ElzarTheBam	3/9/11 6:16 p.m.
Isolated incident?	thereIwasn't	3/9/11 8:33 p.m.
Re: Isolated incident?	arbitersaids	3/9/11 8:38 p.m.
Re: Isolated incident?	thereIwasn't	3/9/11 8:49 p.m.
Re: Isolated incident?	DEEP NNN	3/9/11 8:53 p.m.
Re: Isolated incident?	thereIwasn't	3/9/11 8:59 p.m.
Re: Isolated incident?	DEEP NNN	3/9/11 9:02 p.m.
Some Insight	grantix	3/9/11 9:35 p.m.
Re: Some Insight	thereIwasn't	3/9/11 9:39 p.m.
Re: Some Insight	DEEP NNN	3/9/11 9:53 p.m.
Re: Some Insight	Harmanimus	3/10/11 1:00 a.m.
Re: Isolated incident?	Decommissioner	3/9/11 8:39 p.m.
Re: Isolated incident?	DEEP NNN	3/9/11 8:45 p.m.
Re: Isolated incident?	thereIwasn't	3/9/11 9:08 p.m.
Re: Isolated incident?	Raigns	3/9/11 10:56 p.m.
I'll try.. NM	sqorck	3/10/11 1:04 a.m.
I got one back!	sqorck	3/10/11 1:28 a.m.
I just sent "Hello, Hive is this you?" NM	sqorck	3/10/11 1:33 a.m.
Another	sqorck	3/10/11 1:43 a.m.
Re: Another	Raigns	3/10/11 2:32 p.m.
Acronym? What? Don't think so...	Duncan	3/10/11 7:52 a.m.
Re: Acronym? What? Don't think so...	thereIwasn't	3/10/11 9:35 a.m.
Re: Captain, not everybody is blowing you off...	LoneRanger 2.5	3/9/11 8:40 p.m.
Re: Captain, not everybody is blowing you off...	FyreWulff	3/10/11 2:53 a.m.
Re: Captain, not everybody is blowing you off...	ThePhoenixAeon	3/10/11 11:12 a.m.
Sent Chair a direct email	Carver	3/10/11 5:51 p.m.
Re: Sent Chair a direct email	Carver	3/10/11 6:12 p.m.
Re: Captain, not everybody is blowing you off...	sclamons	3/12/11 11:36 a.m.
Re: Captain, not everybody is blowing you off...	sclamons	3/12/11 10:46 p.m.
Re: Captain, not everybody is blowing you off...	Guywired	3/16/11 9:41 a.m.